How high can you go?
The formula is h = Q.(12 3s/8) to keep wearers of high heels upright.
Physicists at the Institute of Physics have devised a formula that, based on your shoe size, tells you the maximum height of heel you can wear without toppling over or suffering agonies. And it is:
h = Q.(12+3s/8)
h is the maximum height of the heel (in cm)
S is the shoe size (UK ladies sizes). This factor makes sure that the base of support is just good enough for an experienced, and sober, high-heel wearer not to fall over
Q is a sociological factor. It equals p.(y+9).L, divided by (t+1).(A+1).(y+10).(L+£20)M
Where
p the probability that wearing the shoes will help you "pull" (in a range from zero to one, where one is a certainty and zero is stick to carpet slippers). If the shoes are a turn-off, there's no point wearing them
y is the number of years experience you have in wearing high heels. As you become more adept, you can wear a higher heel. Beginners should take it easy
L is the cost of the shoes, in pounds. Clearly, if the shoe is particularly expensive, you can put up with a higher heel
t the time since the shoe was the height of fashion, in months (0 = it's the "in thing" right now). One has to suffer for one's art, and if the shoes are terribly fashionable, you should be prepared to put up with a little pain
A is units of alcohol consumed. If you're planning on drinking, be careful to give yourself a little leeway for reduced co-ordination.
(M is not defined so I used a value of 1.)
This formula means I should wear 3cm (just over an inch) until I have a few drinks then I should be barefoot. Sounds good to me.
Via Perverse Access Memory.
